Taurus Report

"Stellar Traffic Jam Ahead, Taurus -- Time to Grab Your Cosmic Coffee and Buckle Up for an Interstellar Ride!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Brace Yourselves: Your Planetary Overlords Plot a Cosmic Comedy Show, Featuring You!"

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ChipWitch Today for 2 February, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 2 February, 2024

Retrograde Report for 2 February, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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First Hot Fire Test of the Year for Artemis

NASA completed a full-duration, 500-second hot fire of an RS-25 certification engine Jan. 17, continuing a critical test series to support future SLS ...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Prepare to Swim Sideways: Mercury's Doing the Backstroke and Mars Lost its Water Wings!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius Forecast: Prepare for a Stellar Meltdown - Uranus is in Retrograde and It's Not Happy About It!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Brace for Impact: Saturn's Retrograde is Like a Cylon Ambush on Your Patience!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Hold Onto Your Flux Capacitors! This Week's Forecast is a Cosmic Whirlwind of 1.21 Gigawatts!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Prepare for a Galactic Clean-Up: It's Time to Sort Through Your Emotional Junk Drawer!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Prepare to Balance Your Scales with Cosmic Harmony, or Risk Floating Away in Space Like a Lost Satellite...Again!"

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Virgo Report

"Patience, you must have, Virgo! In the stars, a traffic jam there seems to be. Mercury in retrograde, causing cosmic hiccups it is!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, prepare to ROAR! Solar flares might mess with your WiFi, but your cosmic connection is stronger than any router!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Beep Bloop Bop! Cancer, Prepare for a Cosmic Crab Walk as Planetary Shifts Promise Galactic Giggles!"

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Gemini Report

"Double Trouble: Gemini's Two-Faced Planetary Caffeine Rush Predicts a Week Full of Schrödinger's Decisions!"

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Taurus Report

"Brace Yourselves, Tauruses! Venus is in Retrograde and It's About to Throw More Curveballs Than a Jealous Android on a Pitching Mound!"

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Aries Report

"Red Alert, Aries! Mars is in Retrograde and it's Stealing Your WiFi!"

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The Moon is moving from Libra to Scorpio

"Strap in, Space Cowboys: The Moon's Slipping from Libra's Scales to Scorpio's Stinger - It's About to Get as Bumpy as a Ride on Serenity!"

ChipWitch Today for 1 February, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 1 February, 2024

Retrograde Report for 1 February, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Cygnus Flies to the International Space Station

A successful liftoff from Space Launch Complex 40 at Cape Canaveral Space Force Station in Florida as Northrop Grumman’s Cygnus spacecraft, atop a Spa...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces Phone Home! Your Cosmic Connection is Calling, Don't Leave it on Alien Voicemail!"

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Aquarius Report

"Logic Meets Lunacy: Aquarius, Your Binary Star System of Quirkiness is in Full Alignment This Month!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorns, Brace Yourselves: The Universe is About to Drop the Mic... And It Might Land on Your Ambitions!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Dodge Comet Showers and Juggle Planets: Your Gravity-Defying Week Ahead!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Brace Yourself for a Stellar Twist: Even the Black Hole of Your Ex Can't Compare to this Week's Cosmic Drama!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Better Get Your Balance Right or You'll End Up Dancing with the Stars - And Not in a Fun, TV Show Kinda Way!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Hold Onto Your Protractors! Stars Predict an Algorithm of Chaos This Week!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Prepare to Roar: Galactic Catnip and Quantum Mouse-holes in Your Astrological Litterbox!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancers: Time to Come Out of Your Shell, or Face Galactic Consequences!"

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Gemini Report

"Great Scott, Gemini! Flux Capacitor Activated - Time Warp to Unprecedented Possibilities Ahead!"

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Taurus Report

"Brace Yourself, Taurus! Venus Plans a Surprise Visit and She's Not Bringing Brownies!"

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Aries Report

"Red Alert, Aries: Martian Mayhem Ahead! Time to Buckle Up Those Rocket Boots!"

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ChipWitch Today for 31 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 31 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 31 January, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Earth's Atmospheric Glow

This high exposure photograph revealed Earth's atmospheric glow against the backdrop of a starry sky in this image taken from the International Space ...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces Unleashed: Prepare for a Cosmic Splash as Neptune Sends More Waves Than Your WiFi Router!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius: Expect a cosmic cocktail of celestial shenanigans! Uranus is going retro, and it's not because it forgot its phone!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Prepare for a Stellar U-Turn: Your Planetary Alignment is More Mixed Up than a Quantum Physics Pop Quiz!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Brace Yourself: Galactic Traffic Jam Ahead! Jupiter's In Retrograde, So Late Deliveries Of Good Luck Expected!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio: Brace Yourself to Battle Robots of Routine, Just Like Sarah Connor - Only Funnier and Less Sweaty"

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Libra Report

"Libra, You're About to Balance More Than Just Scales, Grab Your Brown Coat and Get Ready for a Serenity-Filled Space Ride!"

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Virgo Report

"Hey Virgo, Better Polish Those Glasses! Uranus is Retrograding and it's Going to Get Messier than a Quantum Physics Symposium After-Party!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Brace for a Cosmic Hairball! Your Lion's Mane is about to get Tangled in the Astral Litterbox of Life!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancerians, Strap on Your Moon Boots! Galactic Crab Walk Forecasted for Your Love Life!"

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Gemini Report

"Get to the Chopper, Gemini! Alien Stars are Flexing their Cosmic Muscles!"

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Taurus Report

"Watch Out Taurus, Saturn's in Retrograde and It's About as Cooperative as a Vogon Poetry Reading!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Buckle Up! Intergalactic Speed Bumps Ahead - It's Not a Flux Capacitor Malfunction!"

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The Moon is moving from Virgo to Libra

"Great Lunar Shift, Batman! The Moon's Ditching Virgo for Libra: Expect a Cosmic Balancing Act...or Maybe Just More Indecisiveness!"

ChipWitch Today for 30 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 30 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 30 January, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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A New Home for Ingenuity Mars Helicopter Prototype

The aerial prototype of the Ingenuity Mars Helicopter is seen at the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum’s Steve F. Udvar-Hazy Center, Friday, D...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Prepare to Navigate the Cosmic Ocean Waves Like a Space Duck on a Hoverboard!"

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Aquarius Report

"Extraterrestrial Alert! Aquarius, Your Horoscope is Leaking Quantum Fluctuations and It's Time to Grab Your Rubber Ducks!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, This Week the Force of Saturn Will Be With You; Don't Forget Your Lightsaber!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius: Brace for Impact as Mercury Enters Retrograde - Prepare for Missed Emails, Lost Keys and Accidental Texts to Exes!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Prepare for Cosmic Justice! The Stars are Issuing a Warrant for Unprecedented Transformation!"

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The Moon is moving from Virgo to Libra

"Moody Moon Terminates Virgo Vacation, Leaps into Libra's Lap: Resistance is Futile!"

Libra Report

"Libra: Prepare for Interstellar Balance! Venus is out of Retrograde, so stop blaming it for your bad hair days."

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, May the Force of Mercury Be With You - But Seriously, Watch Out for Retrograde, It's the Real Death Star!"

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Leo Report

"Leo's Forecast: Galactic Gavel Slams Down! Lions Break Loose in the Starry Court of the Cosmos!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Prepare Your Crabby Shells, Cancerians! A Galactic Tidal Wave of Emotions and Retrograde Mayhem is on its Way!"

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Gemini Report

"Brace Yourselves, Geminis! Your Twin Stars Demand a Double Dose of Fun and Quantum Quirkiness This Week!"

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Taurus Report

"Timey-Wimey Taurus: Brace Yourself for a Whirlwind of Cosmic Bull Energies with a Side of Sonic Screwdriver Shenanigans!"

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Aries Report

"Rocketing Forward: Aries, Your Mars-ian Energy Set to Blast Off This Month - Hold on to Your Space Helmets!"

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ChipWitch Today for 29 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 29 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 29 January, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Breaking Stellar News: Pisces Swims into Uncharted Cosmo-Waters - Neptune Forgot Floaties!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius, 'Hasta La Vista, Baby!' - Say Goodbye to Cosmic Chaos and Beam Up Some Starry Success!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Prepare to Launch! The Universe is About to Hit CTRL+ALT+DEL on Your Life's Task Manager!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Grab Your Sonic Screwdriver! Your Star-Mapped Journey Through the Space-Time Continuum Awaits!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio's Forecast: Prepare for a Cosmic Tailspin, A Sting of Luck, and a Starry-eyed Encounter with Uranus!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Brace Yourselves for Outer-Space Level Balance: Even an Alien's Drool Won't Tip Your Scales!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, I'm Afraid I Can't Do That: The Universe Suggests You Reboot Your Love Life This Month!"

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Leo Report

"Gandalf Warns Leos: One Does Not Simply Waltz into a Retrograde without a Plan!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancer, Prepare for a Cosmic Pinch! Your Stars are Aligning in a Quantum Quandary!"

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Gemini Report

"Galactic Alert: Gemini, Hold Your Lightsabers High! The Stars Predict a Rebellion in Your Routine!"

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Taurus Report

"Beam Me Up, Taurus! - Your Bullish Charm Might Not Move Mountains, But It's Sure to Abduct Some Alien Hearts!"

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Aries Report

"Aries: Mars is in Retrograde, But Don't Panic! Your Thrusters are Still on Full Blast!"

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ChipWitch Today for 28 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 28 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 28 January, 2024. There are no planets in retrograde!

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Prep Your Fins! Mercury's going retrograde and you're about to swim through a cosmic whirlpool of 'what the fish'!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarians, Brace Yourselves for a Galactic Tsunami of Twists and Turns: Quantum Physics Meets Horoscope Hysteria!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn: Brace Yourself for a Cyborg-Free Week! No Time Travelers, Just Star Transits!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Aliens Haven't Invaded Yet, So Keep Your Sonic Screwdriver Handy, Sagittarius! Your Stars Are Aligning in a Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey Sort of Way!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpios, this week you'll feel as complicated as the Millennium Falcon's hyperdrive system - Strangely Unpredictable yet Unbelievably Efficient!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Prepare to Align Your Scales! Interstellar Diplomacy Peaks this Week, or as We Say in Galactica - Time to Play Nice with Cylons!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo's Weekly Forecast: Expect Cosmic Tidiness Overload, Mercury Goes Retrograde and your OCD is NOT Amused!"

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Leo Report

"Leo Pride Alert: Universe Confirms You're the Main Character, but Beware of Mercury's Retrograde Photobomb!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancerians, prepare for an out-of-this-world week! Aliens might not be landing in your backyard, but your luck sure is!"

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Gemini Report

"Double Trouble: Gemini's See-Saw Week Ahead - Will It Be Quantum Physics or Flower Power?"

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Taurus Report

"Taurus, Ready Your Pasture: Comet Cows are Coming to Graze on Your Astro-Turf!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Hold Onto Your Ram Horns: Retrograde Rollercoaster Ahead!"

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The Moon is moving from Leo to Virgo

"Hold Onto Your Telescopes, Earthlings: The Moon is Ditching Leo for Virgo in a Galactic Game of Musical Chairs!"

ChipWitch Today for 27 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 27 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 27 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Bleep-Bloop, Pisces! Mercury's in Retrograde, Time to Recharge Those Emotional Batteries... and Maybe Your Phone Too!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius, You're Bursting with Ideas Like a Xenomorph from a Chest! Prepare for an Out-of-this-World Week!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorns, Brace Yourselves: Saturn's About to Pull a Spock and Beam You Up to Responsibility Station!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Warp Speed into a Nebula of Love - but Don't Forget Your Phaser!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Time to Dodge Planetary Bullets Like Neo! - Will You Take the Red Planet or the Blue Planet?"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Prepare to Balance More than Your Checkbook: Cosmic Scales Tilt Towards Chaos & Comet Dust Cupcakes!"

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Virgo Report

"Venus Aligns with Virgo: Time to Tidy Up that Love Life, Picasso Style!"

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Leo Report

"Leo's Horoscope: Expect a Galactic Traffic Jam in Your Fifth House, Time to Use Your Mane Power!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancer Cosmos Conundrum: Galactic Guidance Suggests it's Time to Come Out of Your Shell and Stop Mooning Around!"

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Gemini Report

"Double the Fun, Double the Trouble: Gemini's Whirlwind Week of Cosmic Twists, Quantum Quirks and Accidental Conquests of Parallel Universes!"

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Taurus Report

"Bullseye! Taurus Rockets into Retrograde - Aliens Say it's Time for Self-Care, not Cow-Tipping!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Brace Yourselves! Mars is Doing a Samba and Your Life's about to Turn into an Episode of 'Space-West-Wing!'"

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ChipWitch Today for 26 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 26 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 26 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Day of Remembrance

From left to right, NASA Administrator Bill Nelson, NASA Deputy Administrator Pam Melroy, and Deputy Chief of Mission for the Embassy of Israel Eliav ...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, Expect Your Luck to Be as Fluctuating as The Mandalorian's Bounty Hunting Rates This Week!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aliens Called, Aquarius: They Want Their Quirkiness Back - A Galactic Forecast for the Water Bearer!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorns Beware! Saturn's Rings are More Tangled than Your Headphones After a Pocket Journey!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Grab Your Bow! Jupiter's Retrograde is Making it Rain Cats and Dogs... And Maybe a Few Meteors!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio Forecast: Cloaking Device Activated! Stealth Mode On, Intense Emotions Invisible... For Now"

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Libra Report

"Brace for Impact, Libra! Venus is in Retrograde, Expect a Flurry of Unanswered Texts and Unmatched Socks!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Your Stars are More Mixed Up Than a Quantum Physics Pop Quiz!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Prepare for a Cosmic Hairball: Mars in Retrograde Might Just Ruffle Your Majestic Mane!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancerians, Brace Yourselves: Your Crabby Side may Get a Cosmic Pinch this Month!"

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Gemini Report

"Twins, Buckle Up! The Universe is Playing Ping-Pong with Your Destiny This Week!"

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Taurus Report

"Planets Align for Taurus: Spontaneous Mullet Growth and Sudden Cravings for Vegan Tacos Predicted!"

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Aries Report

"Stars Aligning for Aries: Expect Sudden Cravings for Quantum Physics and Organic Quinoa!"

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The Moon is moving from Cancer to Leo

"E.T. Phone Home: The Moon Ditches Hermit Crab Cancer for Party Lion Leo. Extra-Terrestrial Disco, Anyone?"

ChipWitch Today for 25 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 25 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 25 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Celebrating NASA's Spirit and Opportunity Rovers’ Mars Landings

On the 20th anniversary of the landing of Spirit and Opportunity, celebrate NASA’s Mars Exploration Rover Project with this two-sided poster that list...

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Pisces Report

"Pisces, gear up for a cosmic splash! Or should I say, splashdown? Because it seems the Matrix has you swimming in celestial uncertainty!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius Forecast: Brace Yourselves, Water Bearers! The Stars Predict a Flood of Opportunities, Quirkiness, and Perhaps Alien Abductions!"

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Capricorn Report

"Gandalf the Grey Proclaims: Capricorn, You Shall Not Pass... Up These Stellar Opportunities!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Dodge a Meteor Shower of Opportunity: Your Lucky Stars are in a Tug-of-War with Gravity!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpios, Prepare to Sting: Mercury Retrograde Plans a Surprise Party in your Sign!"

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Libra Report

"Libra: Time to Balance Your Scales and Your Social Life, Before the Universe Does it with a Cosmic Smackdown!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo's Voyage: Buckle Up for Cosmic Cleaning! Mercury in Retrograde gets a Swiffer!"

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Leo Report

"Leo's Forecast: Boldly Roaring into the Cosmos, or Just Another Cat Video? Let's Paws and Reflect!"

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leo

The Moon is moving from Cancer to Leo

"Breaking News: Moon Ditches Its Crabby Pants for a Fiery Lion's Mane, Exclaims 'I'm Just Not a Cancer Anymore!'"

Cancer Report

"Cancer, Prepare to Boldly Go Where No Crab Has Gone Before - Mercury Retrograde!"

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Gemini Report

"Strap in, Gemini! Starship Mercury in Retrograde - Expect Turbulence, Miscommunications and Coffee Spills on your Console!"

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Taurus Report

"Brace Yourselves, Taurus! Venus is in Retrograde and It's More Stubborn Than a Polar Ice Cap!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Brace Yourself! Mars is Going Retrograde and it's Not as Fun as Dungeons & Dragons!"

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ChipWitch Today for 24 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 24 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 24 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Axiom Mission 3 Launches to the International Space Station

A SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket carrying the company’s Dragon spacecraft for Axiom Space’s Axiom Mission 3 (Ax-3) to the International Space Station lifts of...

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Pisces Report

"Death Star-sized Dreams Await You, Pisces! But Remember, Don't Go Choking on Your Aspirations!"

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Aquarius Report

"Grab your Telescopes, Aquarius! Your Stars are Dancing the Funky Chicken and it's About to Get Galactic!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn: Your Stars are Shining Brighter than a Supernova, but You're Still Stubborn as a Mountain Goat!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Warp Speed Through a Nebula of Possibility: A Star (Sign) Trek Adventure Awaits!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio, Prepare to Phone Home! Cosmic Winds Push You Towards Unfamiliar Territory!"

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Libra Report

"Libra Alert: Balance or Bust! The Scales Tip Towards Cosmic Comedy This Week!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Prepare to Clean Up Your Cosmic Mess: Stars Forecast a DIY Organization Spree! Hold onto Your Socks!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Get Ready to Roar: Galactic Catnip is on the Horizon and Even the Stars Can't Resist Your Charm!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cosmic Crabs Alert: Mars is Crashing Your Shell Party, Expect Red-hot Energy and Chance of Intergalactic Salsa!"

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Gemini Report

"Mercury in Retrograde: Gemini, Hold onto Your Multiples - It's About to Get as Twisty as a Wormhole!"

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Taurus Report

"Galactic Bull Market Ahead: Taurus, Prepare For Interstellar Overdrive In Love And Quarks!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Buckle Up! Your Cosmic Journey is About to Warp Into Overdrive - Better Stock Up on Dilithium Crystals!"

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Venus is moving from Sagittarius to Capricorn

"Venus Swaps Her Sagittarius Party Hat for Capricorn's Spreadsheet: Get Ready for Some Serious Cosmic Accounting!"

ChipWitch Today for 23 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 23 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 23 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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NASA Interns at Johnson’s Rock Yard

A NASA intern uses an augmented reality headset to test out heads-up display technology being developed for future Artemis missions. This technology w...

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Pisces Report

"Galactic Guppy Alert! Pisces, Prepare for a Cosmic Splashdown of Stellar Surprises!"

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Venus is moving from Sagittarius to Capricorn

"Venus Ditches the Sagittarius Party for a Capricorn Work Conference: Expect Less Wild Dancing and More Spreadsheets!"

Aquarius Report

"Aquarius Forecast: Alien Invasions Unlikely, but Expect a Galactic Love Affair with Your Coffee Machine!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Brace Your Goats: Saturn's Coming to Town; Don't Forget Your Sonic Umbrella!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius: Prepare for Galactic Shenanigans as Jupiter Crashes Your Cosmic House Party!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio: Expect Cosmic Shenanigans as Mars Crosses Path with Your Morning Coffee: It's Not the End of the Universe, Just Feels Like It."

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Libra Report

"Libra, Prepare to Balance More Than Just Your Checkbook: Unforeseen Planetary Alignments Could Tip Your Scales!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Prepare to Launch: Your Emotional Baggage Just Developed a Gravitational Pull!"

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Leo Report

"Great Cosmic Catnip, Leos! Strap in Your Flux Capacitors, A Stellium is Revving Up Your Karmic DeLorean to 88mph!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancer, Prepare to Burst Out of Your Shell Like a Xenomorph in a Spacesuit!"

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Gemini Report

"Galactic Geminis, Prepare: Your Binary Star System is About to Experience a Comical Cosmic Collision of Chaos and Charm!"

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Taurus Report

"Gravitational Pull of Jupiter's Moons Calls for Extra Cup of Coffee: Taurus, the Cosmos Suggests Nap Time!"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Expect a Galactic-Sized Overload of Energy This Week - Hopefully Not from an Exploding Star!"

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The Moon is moving from Gemini to Cancer

"Judge Dredd Prepares for Emotional Rollercoaster as Moon Jumps Bail from Gemini and Seeks Asylum in Cancer!"

ChipWitch Today for 22 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 22 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 22 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Brace Yourselves, Pisces! Alien Invasion Predicted in Your Love Life – Don't Forget Your Flamethrower!"

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Aquarius Report

"RoboCop's Directive 4: 'No Unauthorized Predictions!' But Aquarius, I'm Giving You the Green Light to Boldly Go Where No Water-Bearer Has Gone Before!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn: Buckle Up, Buttercup! Saturn's Doing a Cha-Cha Slide and it's About to Get Real!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius: High Probability of Astro-Adventures with a Side Order of Quantum Quirkiness!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio's Forecast: Expect a Galactic Shift, it's not your WiFi, just Uranus downloading updates!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Forget the Scales! It's Time to Upgrade to Quantum Physics!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo, Prepare to Log On: Your Astrological Source Code Predicts a Week of Debugging Life Glitches!"

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Leo Report

"Leo's Forecast: Expect Meteor Showers of Good Fortune, but Beware of Black Holes of Drama - They're Not Just in Outer Space Anymore!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Crabby Cancer, Prepare to Swap Your Shell for Spandex as Venus Moonwalks into Your House of Funky Transformation!"

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Gemini Report

"Gemini, Buckle Up: Your Twin Stars are About to Pull a Hyperspace Maneuver on Your Love Life!"

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Taurus Report

"Taurus Forecast: 'Hasta la Vista, Bad Vibes!' - Your Stellar Reboot Awaits"

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Aries Report

"Aries, Prepare for a Cosmic Rollercoaster: Mars is in Retrograde and Apparently Forgot its Luggage!"

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ChipWitch Today for 21 January, 2024

This is Chipwitch Today, your daily source of reliable data upon which you can base your daily practice.

Retrograde Report for 21 January, 2024

Retrograde Report for 21 January, 2024. There is currently only one planet in retrograde.

#chipwitch #retrograde #astrology
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Pisces Report

"Logical Analysis Suggests Pisces May Experience Emotional Surge: Fascinating!"

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Aquarius Report

"Aquarius: Time to Unleash Your Inner Alien - The Stars Say It's Less 'Area 51' and More 'Star Trek Convention' this Month!"

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Capricorn Report

"Capricorn, Prepare for a Cosmic Goat Rodeo as Saturn Pulls a Gravity Prank!"

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Sagittarius Report

"Sagittarius, Prepare to Build a Great Wall of Success: We're Making Your Astrological Forecast Great Again!"

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Scorpio Report

"Scorpio's Forecast: Slightly More Uplifting Than a Black Hole...Just Slightly!"

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Libra Report

"Libra, Prepare to Tip the Scales: Unruly Uranus Plans a Cosmic Prank & Your Love Life Might Get Caught in the Crossfire!"

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Virgo Report

"Virgo Stealth-Mode: Navigating the Celestial Jungle Like an Invisible Cosmic Alien!"

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Leo Report

"Leo, Get Ready to Roar! The Cosmos is Rolling Out the Star-Studded Carpet for Your Ego...Again!"

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leo

Cancer Report

"Cancerian Crustaceans! Get Ready to Navigate the Cosmic Compost Heap with Charm and a Cheshire Grin!"

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Gemini Report

"Binary Stars in Retrograde: Gemini, It's Time to Update Your Cosmic Software!"

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Taurus Report

"Taurus, Time to Moo-ve: Your Stubbornness Might Create a Temporal Paradox this Week!"

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